The Seventh Month

Awesome milestones before he turned seven months--and because his brain was on overdrive, we had to deal with a few weeks of this little thing called sleep regression: You think his sleep pattern has become predictable and then, bam!, he wakes up every hour to feed/be cuddled/no reason at all. Because his brain was processing so many things, he couldn't seem to get long stretches of sleep, and would sometimes wake up in a crawling position, freaking out because he didn't know what was happening. (Poor thing.) There were nights when I slept seated in my feeding chair, with him in my arms, because it was the only way he could get any sleep. Fun!

All worth it though, because the reason his brain was hyperactive was:

• He discovered the wonders of opening and closing his hands. He has this look of amazement when he holds his hand up in front of his face!
• He started sitting up without support...

• He began sort of crawling. (Up to now, he hasn't quite mastered it, but his nanny thinks he's one of those babies who skip crawling and go straight to walking. Hmm.)

• He started putting his toes in his mouth. (I wonder if this, er, achievement is included in Baby Center's list of official milestones...)

• He kept being an absolute sweetheart.

The Fifth Month

Five months. How quickly time flies!

This little man is getting more entertaining as each day passes. He keeps rolling and rolling and rolling (you're right, Ric, he didn't forget!), and as he does so, I sing all these songs with "roll" in them ("You gotta roll with it..." "Rollin' with the homies..." "Rollin' in the deeeeeep..."). He says "mmmammmaaaaa." He super enjoys his bath. He has started showing an interest in food--he was looking at a cake display and we could see him smacking his lips! He's all serious around his daddy. He also tries to get my attention by crying, and sometimes he doesn't stop until I pick him up. Sometimes he cries before I leave for work. Worst part of my day! (Personal update: My hair has seriously started falling out. Ack!)

A few photos from this past month...

My first official Mother's Day! 

Baby's first road trip!

Babiators borrowed from cousin Xabi

I couldn't resist buying him a hat and swimming trunks that could only fit him that one time (and, horrors, I had to squeeze into a swimsuit)...

Baby's first swim! He was just quiet and he kicked the water a bit. I think he couldn't wrap his head around the giant palanggana.

I now truly understand that saying about the days being long but the years being short. I've had some pretty long days and nights, especially this past week! He seems to be in the middle of a growth spurt, so he feeds every one to two hours. It's insane. I haven't had straight two hours' sleep in ages. Oh, what I would give for four straight hours of sleep! It's amazing though how one's body adjusts. I can still manage to play with him when he wakes up at 6 am, and even function at work. Motherhood is an upper unlike any other.

Even with the lack of sleep, I just want to hit the pause button. It's going by so so so fast. He'll be crawling then walking then running in no time. I am enjoying this phase immensely--he still wants to be carried and cuddled, he still makes the funniest sounds, don't have to run after him yet. I get why mothers of older kids just want to carry him!

The Second Month

On his second-month birthday, A got totally wasted (on mommy's milk)

Things have gotten somewhat easier--because I'm not going to lie to you, the first month (the first two weeks especially) was hard. I'm the youngest in the family so I had never taken care of a baby, and so I was completely clueless. No book or birthing class can prepare you for all the inexplicable crying, for the amount of feeding a little barracuda requires, and the amount of time you need to devote to take care of a little one.  I never understood that last one until now--people say all a baby does is eat and sleep. But this one eats A LOT (and he's purely breastfed), so it's an endless cycle of feed-burp. He's also at the low end of the spectrum of average hours of sleep, and when he's awake, he demands to be entertained!

I knew that my life was going to change, but I didn't expect it to change that much. It was just the two of us for more than three years, so to say we went through an adjustment is a bit of an understatement. I went through the baby blues--I mourned the loss of my previous life, sad that things were never going to be the same again. I couldn't hop on a plane on a whim--heck, going to two-hour disc training (yes, I'm back!) requires extensive planning! Don't get me wrong, I was (and am) crazy in love with our little darling, but this new normal was taking a toll on me emotionally. It made things that much harder, and me that much sadder.

But one day I realized that I just simply had to embrace that things were never going to be the same. I was called on to be a mother--a privilege not everyone has--and it meant truly letting go of my selfish past, and loving the fact that I pretty much belonged to another human being. The minute I accepted that I was a different person with a different life now, I was ready to be a different kind of happy.

It still isn't easy. There is still some inexplicable crying sometimes, but at least we're better at reading his cues now. And he has a semblance of a routine now, and he seems to know it. By 6 or 7 a.m., I can hear him going, "Eh! Eh! Eh!" and he won't stop until someone comes and talks to him. (Yes, he "talks" now! He's quite chatty and he's got a LOUD voice, so it's hilarious.) By 11 a.m., he's ready for his bath. By 6:30 p.m., he's ready for his bedtime ritual: We change him into his jammies, and then I feed him. If he's still wide awake, I play music or read him a story. Once he's somewhat sleepy, I rock him in my arms and sing to him. Of course he's still in his newborn stage, so he throws us for a loop sometimes (e.g., sleeping four straight hours one night, then feeding literally every hour the next--guess who ends up not getting any sleep?). But it's more manageable now.

Besides, it's hard not to be happy when he's learned how to do this:

♥